Hi there. You're probably used to my unusual take on the world of podcasting, or you probably couldn't give two shits. Regardless, what I'm going to try to do in addition  to this is tell you about podcasts that I actually listen to and don't actively take the piss out of.

Black Tapes Podcast

I've always been skeptical about podcasts in the horror genre. I'm not spooked easily and I'm not always ready to suspend my disbelief so when I was recommended this by my fiance I wasn't immediately sold on it. What I found however was a show that was well written, well produced and really stylized that perhaps I could say that it may well be the podcast equivalent of a combination of both Twin Peaks and the X-Files which may be the highest compliment I could give this podcast.

Episode one may not grip you as well as it should do as it tries very hard to introduce you to the main characters, it's format and Doctor Richard Stand's relevance to the show's name Black tapes. This show is one of the best scripted podcasts available and I'm not suggesting that you should go into a dark room and binge on it immediately, but you definitely should.

Mark Kermode's Celluloid Jukebox

I have one general rule which is to basically listen to anything that Mark Kermode is in. His podcast with Simon Mayo is world class and one that I would hold up as one of Britain's best. He returns to Radio 2 with a series about film music much like his mini series 'The Soundtrack of my life' in which he plays some of the best music from film.

Kermode leads the listener through some of the best film soundtracks regardless of whether they were critical or commercial successes and justifies his choices with his extensive knowledge of the film industry. It is an absolute must for anybody who is obsessed with film sountracks like me.

3) Sampler

What does podcasting have to offer you? Gimlet are killing it at the moment and they continue to kill it with this, a Podcast about Podcasts. Host Brittany Luse speaks to a variety of guests about podcasts with a different theme to each episode. Guests thus far include Anna Sale from 'Death, Sex and Money', Heben and Tracy from 'Another Round' and Molly ruddy Ringwald.

I'm always on the look out for new and exciting podcasts and Sampler has helped introduce me to a plethora of podcasts. In addition to this Sampler shines a light on the importance of podcasting and its versatility in regards to the characters who are at the forefront and overall subject matter.

I like writing and talking about podcasts. If there is something you think I should be listening to or even better you want me to listen to your podcast please give me a shout on the Twitter @_Morningkel

In the immortal words of some random spotty gamer youtuber "What's up guys" and welcome to another addition of...my blog. So remember when I guided you through the world of Podcasting start here if you don't and when you're up to scratch come back ffs.

Ok so you read this so lets continue. As you may know I genuinely think that Serial is the best thing since diced bread. So in the same vain I will never reveal my top picks for the next season of Serial featuring Sarah Keonig. The first season followed the story of the murder of Hae Min Lee and the sketchy imprisonment of the arrest of her then boyfriend Adnan Syed. Let us begin.

1) Cat Bin Lady

So yeah we start with the most obvious choice but the after the incident of a British woman slamming a cat into a wheelie bin in 2010 and there were many unanswered questions. The most obvious one being why? Why would one do that? But perhaps this story of one woman and her obsession with cat slamming has two sides to the story and is maybe a complicated backstory what Sarah Keonig could explore. I would be imperative to talk to relatives of the victim and the perpetrator in order to find out the attackers motives.

2) Watergate

Okay was Nixon behind Watergate? How can one be sure? If season one has taught us anything it is that in every case, the details are never black and white. Sure literally every single piece of evidence points towards Nixon being the perpetrator but did he work alone? Of course not. Who was really pulling the strings? Surely not the actual president of the United States? Something doesn't add up. This is something our girl Sarah can find out and explore in details and the absolute truth behind Watergate and finally give us closure over one of US politic's biggest mysteries.

3) The crimes of OJ Simpson

No not THAT crime. Okay so we KNOW he wasn't behind the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman because he was acquitted and that is scientific fact. I'm referring to the crimes in which he is currently serving time for which is armed robbery and kidnapping. This was a a feeble attempt by the man to imprison the juicer after he escaped jailtime thanks to Johnny Cochran and Rob Kardashian. Sarah Keonig could explore the details of his arrest and prove to the world once and for all that OJ Simpson is a decent bloke after all.

4)  Marky Mark the racist

Okay so back in the day before such epics as The Other guys, The Departed and James Bond Bourne Mark Goldberg was known as a "common street thug" and was once put in the prison for abusing Vietnamese and black people. Mark Damon then went on to make rap music and according to local media sources at the time the hypocrisy could been seen from space.

Mark went on to great things appearing in both Saving Private Ryan and Ted but his past has always haunted him which is why Sarah the Koenig should investigate as to Why Matt Walhberg may or may not have been behind the racially motivated atrocities. Batman vs Superman opens in theaters Friday the 25th March.

5) Who did killed Lucy Beale?

So in researching this topic I googled the term 'Who killed' and the only search results Google found was who killed was "Who killed Lucy Beale." Yep, not Jr Ewing or Mr Burns it was Lucy Beale. So Sarah Koenig in the third series should get on the case and find out whether or not it was Bobby Beale because I sincerely have my doubts and there is no one else alive better at planting doubts in my mind than Sarah or her cavalcade of podcastateers.

Was Bobby taking the fall for somebody and was it the ghost of Den Watts who perpetrated the horrendous murder of Luceal Beale? Who fucking knows dude but the kid brother just seems far too convenient. Maybe he was covering for Den or the ghost of other East-end bad guys like Johnny Allen or Bradley Branning.

Honorable mentions:

The assassination of Jesse James
The Banking Crisis of 2008
The Chilcot report
The murder of Dirty Den (The second one)

Serial's third season will be electric regardless of what crime it focuses on, but you can bet your dollar bottom that it will be one of these. I've been Kelsey Daly. And this is the first in my series called "Podcast focus."

Greetings friend. By now you are well on your way to making a successful podcast and you are starting to gain a following online via social media and your amazing production skills as a person who has invested a vast amount of money into their new business (which is pod-casting)

I'll touch on the power of networking and advertisement so eventually you might be able to get mailchimp...mailkhimp? As a part of your podcast network. So shut up as I list the last 5 pieces of the puzzle, how to actually make money from your podcast. I'm gonna tell you what Marc Maron and Ira Glass WON'T tell you. Ok let's begin.

 Step 1) Network you arse

Okay name me one person in podcast history who has been successful on their own two feet? Okay name a another? And so on. You need to talk to people via online and when you do that they might know people who want to pay you money. Not everybody will pay you money so approach with caution, so why not go pester people online who are also podcasters in their own right. I heard Alec Baldwin made podcasts once so tweet or email him to plug your new podcast. Now shut up.

Strap 2) Using your established contacts

You've spoke to the head of mailkimp. I'd never heard of it until the Serial came along so you're quite likely to strike a deal with companies like that. Audible dot com is another one. I've heard about it a lot but never been onto to it because I don't care for audiobooks but your audience definitely will. This level of ignorance and obliviousness will help hashtag drive your podcast to become one of the mopst bankable podcasts available as you will aim to advertise without and prejudice.

Steph 3: Twitter you ultimate tool

You need to use Twitter to your advantage and you know the old saying that you gotta spend money to make money. I think Sinatra said that. In regards to Twitter however they have a new tool where you can view your impressions online and pay them money to extend that reach. For example I paid them £70 for 50 people to view my tweet about Serial and now I'm in a closed Facebook group about Serial so who is the podcast king now suckers. It's me.

Strep 4) Record advertisements

Are your listeners enjoying your hashtag content? Good. Now is a good time to pretend to you are about to segue into a conversation when in reality you're about to plug your advertiser. Ensure to refer to them as 'content providers' instead of advertisers and remind your audience that with out them you will CHARGE THEM for listening to the show in Leyman's terms. Let them know that if they don't click that amazon link then you won't do the podcast. It's that simple because you're now essentially running a business not a joke parlor.

Stop 5: Sweet Sweet Merch

The last step on the road to success sees you make some bank out of your new business model. Why not make a t shirt out of your latest series? How about some sweet scarfs? Everybody likes scarfs and will certainly wear your scarf if your hashtag narrative is good enough. In fact I have a Sarah Keonig scarf at home so shut up. Ask your overpaid producer to print the t shirts personally, what are they being paid for? To sit around and edit? Shut up.

This concludes my series on how to produce a successful podcast. Next week I'll sit on my kitchen floor and cry because I don't have a successful podcast of my own, but it's been really fun telling you people to to make one. Shut up. 

Have a peak at the previous 3 steps and then shut up some more:

http://kdalyportfolio.blogspot.com/2016/03/how-to-start-successful-podcast-in-5.html

http://kdalyportfolio.blogspot.com/2016/03/5-steps-to-producing-successful-podcast.html

http://kdalyportfolio.blogspot.com/2016/03/5-steps-to-publishing-successful-podcast.html

Hello and welcome to yet another addition to my 5 steps to podcasting series. In this post I will guide you to publishing your fancy new podcast online in the hope that your podcast gets to your fancy new audience on the fancy new social media age. Okay let's begin,

Stepp 1: Upload to the internet

I cannot stress enough how important it is to upload your podcast to the internet. If you fail to follow this step it leaves you with only one alternative which is to burn your podcast onto a CD and hand it out to people on the street. DO NOT DO THIS. If you want your podcast to reach a fresh new age audience it will need to be uploaded onto some sort of website.

Steph 2: What sort of website?

I like Mixcloud. it doesn't cost a lot. It helps if you're part of some podcasting network if you align yourself with a successful production company like a WBEZ Chicago or ultimately you become a sister podcast of This American life. Get yourself a flashy new blog and post it there. This will give your dazzling new audience a platform in which to listen to your ostentatious audio content.

Stem 3: Jazz it up some

When uploading your poidcast think about whether your extravagant new podcast needs to be visually appealing aswell as audibly stunning. Think about your artwork and a synopsis for each episode. Still thinking about creating the next successful episodic investigative murder podcast? Why not post an image of the victim when they were younger and make said victim the next Laura Palmer? Black and White or Sepia tone effects will add to your content tenfold.

Make sure you describe each episode in great and epic detail too, so each episode doesn't get lost in the shuffle and for god sake number each episode. Many of us brash young hipsters don't have TIME to listen to each episode one by one and find it hard to avoid spoilers, so let your cunning new audience skip to the end to reveal who the killer really was.

Strep 4: Post it on social media

How many followers do you have? IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW MANY FOLLOWERS YOU HAVE! To elaborate further, even if you have a 5 star producer, a 5 star production suite and a 5 star podcast it will count for nothing if you don't have social media presence. It doesn't matter if you don't have many followers because there are ways to attract the right attention in promoting your podcast on social media. For example why not tweet directly towards celebrities in the hope that they will retweet your content to millions of their followers? Ricky Gervais had a podcast once, so why wouldn't he take two seconds out of his day to help a fellow podcastation establish them self?

Stop 5: New and Noteworth on iTunes

So, you've followed me this far on this journey to publishing your brand spanking new podcast and it is online for the world to see. The next logical step is to get that podcast on the iTunes and there are only a handful of ways to do so. For one you can ask your producer to do it for you, what are you paying them for? You could also try contacting iTunes directly and asking them to do it for you? I did that for my own podcast back in 2011 and I sent them a fruit basket. Or finally, something to do with an RSS feed. Boring I know.

Establishing a base on iTunes is important because it is the granddaddy of streaming and downloading podcasts. It is your best bet to delivering your content to your grandiose new audience from the hashtag social media age. For example, Serial has been on the iTunes top 100 since November in 2014 and that is no happy accident. This is because it is definitively the best, greatest and most influential podcast in the world besides none. That is until your podcast comes along.

The next stop on our journey is how to monetize your podcast and make some sweet sweet bank.  Do not miss it. 

Hi it's another addition to the kdalyportfolioblogs 5 steps series. This week I will look at the five steps of producing a successful podcast. This is in reference to the technical aspect to creating YOUR peabody award winning podcast. The general rule is that if do some dope producing you'll have a chance to show them what time it is. Ok let's begin.

Step 1) Choose editing software that is suitable for YOU

If you want to record a podcast but not edit it you wont have the same success that serial has. Hell you wont have any success if you just want to record and publish each segment. Why would you do that though? your best bet is to download Adobe Audtion. You've paid thousands for your home studio that I told you to set up, so forking out an extra £1000 wont be a problem. Especially when you're about to make your podcast your business. Right lads? Or I mean, go with Audcity, although there is not a blue chance in hell that Serial used Audacity to create their #product (citation needed)

Step 2) Learned how to edit

Listen, if you can't edit a programme then give up. Sarah Keonig knew how to edit and that's how Serial won a Peabody award. Think somebody will edit your podcast for you for free? Guess again. In the same breathe you have just spent at least £6000 on a home studio and a legal copy of Adobe Audtion so you might aswell spend whatever money you have on a producer, so feel free to skip this #step.

Step 3) Sound effects

It's not possible to go into the world and record yourself making noises just for your podcast. So go onto the internet and torrent sound effects. Make sure with your remaining budget you buy good anti virius software. McAfee is really shit so go with something more expensive why not. If you're worried about money at this point, don't be because you're about to make that money back and if you don't your parents can always give you the money, right? #cash

Stepped 4) Music

If you're watching your paid producer use your mac to finalise your edit remember to tell said producer to add some FUCKING music. I can't stress that enough. I don't know any podcasts that don't have music and if there are any that exist I don't want to know about them tbh. Listen, it can be tricky because people will be ticked off if you use music willy nilly so be smart about it. Why not go for artists who've died so that they cannot pursue legal action against you. Thin Lizzy, Syd Barrett and Green day would be prominent examples to use for your music. Serial had it's own theme music, so you need to invest in your own. Seek out music producers online or tweet about #booty or #titties and let them seek you. If said producer has 44k followers and follows approx 44k people then there is nothing fishy about that so run with #it.

Stop 5) Levels

Buddy you gotta check those levels. If the green bars on your mixer aren't the same height then chances are it wont sound hashtag professional. Ask your producer to fix your levels. Take a look on your software. Are the spike things roughly the same size? If not why not? What are you paying your producer for? If you're going to be speaking to a number of suspects in your episodic investigative murder podcast then it is important everybody sounds the same. Whilst you're at it you want to make sure that your mixdown is in #mono because #stereo sounds like you're a dog who has one ear tucked in (as illustrated)

Next week I will show you the 5 ways to #Publish a successful podcast onto the internet

Here is kdalyportfolioblog's 5 steps into achieving success in the podcasting world. Podcasts are like the radio but on the internet instead and you don't even have to be a Terry Woganesque (rip) character to pull it off. You can achieve your dreams and I will be the one to lead you through it.

Step 1: Realise you like podcasts

If you don't like podcasts stop right now thank you very much, because shut up. How can you not like podcasts and why are you here? Nevertheless and irregardless you will need to listen to podcasts first otherwise your show will sound a bit pooey. Start by first listening to Serial which is the most important podcast in the history of the world. It shows you how creative podcasters can be. So give that a listen at the very least.

STEP 2: Equip yourself with equipment!

Your phone isn't good enough. People on your google search might say it is good enough but I'm here to say that NO! It isn't. You need to get yourself, if possible an Apple Mac, a home studio with soundproof walls, a mixer and a professional mic. If you don't you will never be Serial and if you don't want your podcast to be Serial what's the point? Why not just quit and go home and edit videos of sassy kids to the sound of smoke weed every day by Snoop dog.

Step 3: Get some friends

If you want to be the next Serial you can't go it alone. The same goes with any successful podcast as you will never record a good one person podcast unless you're a half naked right wing nutjob in your spareroom. So get somebody involved, preferably somebody with at least 7 years of professional radio experience, if not settle for a friend. If you don't have friends I don't know what to tell you because that isn't how Serial won a Peabody award.

Step 4: Pick the right topic

What's is your topic of discussion? Has somebody done it already? Say you wanted to talk about the smoke and mirrors trail of a certain murder suspect in Baltimore in 1999 , well my friend it may have already been done. Crime podcasts are the rage right now so why not pick something that people aren't talking about. For example, is anyone still talking about the Cat Bin lady? Probably not. Be original and perfect your craft or watch better people do it instead.

Step 5: Record in the right environment

You got your professional home studio set up? GOOD. The next and final step is about you stepping into the world to talk to potential guests or murder suspects. Start by googling said suspect and find them and to talk to them. The next part is tricky because you want to avoid loud areas like train stations so why not ask your interviewee to join you in the closest wheelie bin.

I hope that you take my advice. Next time I will tell you how to produce a successful podcast and get it out to the world so that they can criticize you for it. 

Greeting friends. Apologies for not blogging enough lately. I'm taking a break from podcasting this time around and am dabbling in the unappreciated art of playlisting. It's very typical of a Brit to post absolute bollocks about the weather but hey-ho.

Spring is my favorite season and it's genuinely just about the right temp outside and there are memories that are way too soppy to have somebody read considering I am a full grown adult male now. So listen, enjoy this playlist because the chances are that I will forget to do another one for literal months.

Thank you for your patience and I will start reviewing some fantastic podcasts that I gone out and listened to recently. In the meantime I made this wee little playlist for spring and I hope that this will inspire at least one other person to come up with their own list of personal spring faves which untimely wont be as good as this one.

Kel